10.11.2021 /

Thankful for you

Game Over

Today (everyday) I give thanks to all the blessings in my life. Often times I get so caught up in my mind, I focus on all the things that are missing. When in reality I should focus on all that I have.

I am thankful for:

  1. Meaghen being the most incredible mom and partner.
  2. My family and friends being healthy and safe.
  3. All my clients (you guys) who support me to live my passion, everyday.
  4. The opportunity I GET TO show up each and everyday, even when it’s hard.
  5. Max walking!!!!

I am making it a point to be on my phone less today. And spend that quality time with my loved ones. 

Thank you guys for being here. For all your support of myself and my family and what you guys do for yours.

GRATEFUL

Steve Ramos

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09.21.2021 /

Slow down

It was a big weekend for our little boy, Maxton. It was so amazing I figured I’d like to share it with you guys!

As some of you know our son just turned 1 (I know where has the time gone?) We had his birthday party and his baptism this weekend. We are so proud of him. He really handled it like a little gentleman.

Thank you to all my friends and family for showing up to celebrate our little boy! Special shout out to my mom for making all the food! To my family for helping us set up and clean up. And for all the amazing gifts! Max is truly blessed with all the love and support.

So crazy to think that, it felt like yesterday, when we got engaged and were just thinking about having a child. And here we are, over one year later. With a fun, healthy and thriving boy. I was so hesitant about proposing to Meaghen, not because I didn’t want to but I was worried that everything would work out. With our future together, my business and all the stuff in between. And I can tell you right now, it’s all working out.

Sitting here taking it all in, here are some things I learned:

1. Take risks. When we follow our heart and take that risk into uncertainty, the universe/god guides us and everything ALWAYS works out in some way. ALWAYS.
2. Slow down. Time flies. Especially moments we have with our loved ones. It’s easy to be on our phones when in reality we need to spend that quality time paying attention to our family. We can never get those moments back.
3. Trust. In ourself and the journey we are on. We have 2 options: Go through life with more stress and strain. Or flow through life trusting that everything happens exactly as it should. When we can be in a place of more trust. Things flow easier and we go through life happier.

Easier said than done. But with more intention, we will have the awareness to catch ourselves and bring ourselves into the present moment. In the end that is all we truly have.

Thanks for following the journey. From the bottom of my heart.

Grateful for you,
Steve Ramos

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09.23.2020 /

Uncertainty

Fear of the unknown. Of starting a family. Of taking any risk.

Should I? What if this goes wrong? What if I fail? I don’t know if I can do it. I know I want to, but the fear of the unknown, the uncertainty, is preventing me from doing it. So we wait. And wait. And wait. Even though your gut, your intuition, is damn near screaming at you to do it. Does this sound familiar?

These are common questions, thoughts, concerns that run through all of our minds before any big decision. As they should.

Even before Meaghen and I were engaged, I really wanted to propose but I thought about everything: how would I afford a ring? How would I afford a wedding? A child? A new home? All of that overwhelmed me. I felt at times I couldn’t even take care of myself.

I spoke with my aunt and uncle for advice. They talked to me about taking a leap of faith. What they said really stuck with me: Sometimes you are unsure of how everything will work out. But if you truly believe, in your heart, it is something that you need to do, you must take that leap of faith. Focus on one thing, then do whatever you need to do to figure it out and most importantly have faith in yourself, Universe, God. Have courage, take the next step, put in the daily work and have faith. If you do that whole heartedly, everything just seems to work out. Someway, somehow.

It seemed so far fetched for me. But it was something that I know I needed to do. Once I commited to buying the ring I put in work. I meditated on it, I journaled on it, I asked for help (in my mind). It’s crazy when you just put it out there, the universe, God conspires to help you.

That same week I gained 5 clients. They seemed to drop in my lap. They all reached to me. Boom, just like that, within a couple months I had enough cash to put aside to buy the ring!

For me, starting my own business was scary enough. As an entrepreneur, things aren’t stable. Clients come and go. And I’m always feeling like I’m having to try and “sell.” But I had to really have faith in myself and my ability to do the work. The most important thing was to have faith in my ability to figure it out. That was the game changer. Even if I didn’t know how, at the time, I had to have faith that it would work itself out.

And here we are. Almost one year later. With a beautiful, healthy baby boy. And it is all just working out. And it feels right.

I reflect on where I think I should be versus where I am. I create stress and suffering within myself because I think I’m supposed to be farther ahead. With business. With finances. With a home etc… But then I hold my son and realize that I am exactly where I need to be. When we can let go of those expectations but still strive to be better each day, life becomes more free. We live with more ease. With more joy. With more love and more happiness. In the end, that is truly what life is all about.

I have no idea what the future holds but I will keep waking up early and doing the best I can each and every day. And when I want to give up, I remind myself “DO IT FOR THEM.”

Fucking grateful,
Stephen Albert Ramos

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08.01.2020 /

Everything happens as it should

There I was, frantically looking for my passport. Typical, I leave my packing till the night before. I looked everywhere. It was nowhere to be found. My flight was in a few hours at 5 am…

My brother bought me a flight to LA for my birthday. It has become an annual thing (pre-Covid) for the last few years. We used to go to LA as a family every year, so this is a place that we hold dear to our hearts. The energy there reminds me of our family, our dad.

I was in complete disbelief. I’ve never missed a flight (or lost my passport) ever before. And there it was, 1 hour before my flight and my passport was gone. I was pissed. All the meditations I’ve done to this point seemed null. I couldn’t understand why. I was so angry at myself. How could I have lost it? Why is this happening?

My brother was already in LA waiting for me, so I had to go. I expedited a new passport and booked another flight, which was not cheap. The soonest I could go was the next evening.

What was the good from all this? I got to spend my birthday with my lovely girlfriend. She knew how upset I was so she booked us a day at Thermea, a beautiful spa. She really helped me be present in the moment.

Through this whole time, I could barely move my neck. Injured from working out. But I know it was a multitude of things; Stress, pressure, anger, sadness of my father passing.

I landed in LA. I finally made it! I tried to make the most of the short time I had there. Even though I was only there for 2 days, it was worth it. I spent my time there with my brother and my 33rd birthday was amazing.

On my way home, I was sitting in the terminal of LAX airport. I had a lacrosse ball that I was rolling my neck and back against a wall. My neck was fucked. I could barely move it, like batman. As I was rolling, this beautiful girl walked by. I made a second glance and thought, “Wow, she is beautiful.” This thought passed by and left just as she did.

Walking onto the flight, looking for my seat scanning the isles. I stopped and found my seat. Who happened to be sitting next to me? That girl. The guy in me was trying to act cool. I put my bag into the above compartment. We caught eyes for a second, I smiled, she smiled back and then I sat down.

My usual ritual when I fly: Journal. I wrote about my experience of my trip. As I journaled, I noticed she kept glancing over but didn’t think much of it. Whenever the plane takes off, I always get anxious, so I meditate. The sound of the plane taking off is quite soothing, for my mind and stomach. As we were in the air, I noticed a Tony Robbins podcast playing on her phone.

For whatever reason I felt I needed to talk to her (and no, not because she was beautiful). I pointed at her phone, she slowly took one headphone out. And I said, “He changed my life.” She took out the other headphone and said, ‘”Mine too.”

We both opened up and had such an amazing conversation, one that I normally never have with a stranger. We quickly had a deep connection. She asked me why I was there. I explained that I was there for my birthday and that our annual trips to LA reminded me of my father who recently passed. We both started to get emotional and tear up. She was silent for a few moments. She looked at me and said “my sister commited suicide.”

Right then and there, I knew that I was meant to talk to her. I knew that everything that happened thus far led me here. She told me the entire story. I felt so sad for her. It also made me reflect on my father passing.

I had such a hard time dealing with his death. The fact that it felt so abrupt. Everything seemed fine and then all of a sudden, boom, he had 4 weeks to live. When he passed I couldn’t help but beat myself up on how I treated him. How I always wished to have a better relationship with him.

I’ll never forget the next thing she said to me. “You had time to say goodbye, I wish I had that with my sister.” That put everything into perspective. She was right, I had time with him.

Even though my father was gone, I had time with him to tell him everything I wanted to tell him. And all of a sudden everything; the pain, the passport, none of that mattered. I felt lighter. I felt more at peace. I knew it was all worth it.

What did I learn from all of this?

Things, people, situations come into our lives, even if just for a moment, to teach us lessons. To help us. Often times it is very hard to see, especially when it’s ‘bad’, but it’s happening for a reason. It’s happening exactly as it should.

To that girl I met for just a moment. Thank you. I am truly grateful for you.

Love,
Stephen Alberto Ramos

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05.21.2020 /

How meditation has saved my life

I woke up at 7am. Brushed my teeth. Sat in my meditation spot. Set the meditation timer (calm app) for 20 minutes and closed my eyes. The same routine I’ve done for the last 3 years of my life.

After completing my 1304th+ session (252 hours 44+ minutes), I received a text from my long time friend, Kevin.

“Happy World Meditation Day” he said.

I didn’t even know this day existed. But to honour what it has done for my life, it is only fair that I share with you how it has saved mine.

It has become a daily ritual that I must do everyday. Just like physical training has changed my body, meditation has strengthened my mind. Learning to find the calm amidst the noise has helped me with my anger, depression and anxiety, the most.

How so?
By helping me become present in the moment, where the past and future don’t matter. I used to live in the past AND present. I would relive painful situations/memories and recreate the same emotions over and over and over. Sometimes still do.

But what is that actually doing for me except create disease of the body and mind? We aren’t truly living until we can be present. In this moment. Right now. I learned when the Dr. told us that my father had 4 weeks to live. Sitting in the hospital with him, everything became so clear. Nothing else mattered, the money, recognition and material things. The only thing that mattered was each moment that we had left with him.

You are not your thoughts,
You have thoughts

This really changed my world: I am not my thoughts. Meditation gave me the space to seperate myself from the thoughts in my head. Learning to let them pass by like the wind and not let them take me away and spin crazy (untrue) made up stories in my head.

It has also really helped me tone down my anger. I am by no means perfect and have lots of work to do, but I have come a very long way. And for that I am so proud of myself. It has helped me build a buffer around my thoughts so that I can respond, instead of react to situations or things that would normally have made me explode in anger.

It also really helped me slow down. To be present with each conversation, each task without trying to multi-task 5 different things at once.

There are some good sessions. Some really hard sessions. Some sessions where I wasn’t present at all. But what I learned is that it is not about how ‘good’ you are at meditating and understanding that everyday is different. The most important part is just the simple act of sitting down and spending time with yourself. Building self awareness through quieting the mind.

I used to get mad at myself. Ruminating about the past. Worrying about the future. Then the timer goes off. But now I know that it is part of the practice. Just like anything, it’s the consistent, disciplined repetition of a simple habit that has profound change.

The stats of my meditation practice I mentioned up above is to not brag. It is to show you how one simple act, everyday, adds up. Daily training of the mind compounds and can truly rewire the brain and change it for the good.

It doesn’t take much:

  1. Set it in your calender: Same time everyday. I do it first thing in the morning, which I found works best for me. All you need is 5 minutes.
  2. Make it easy: have a spot set up for you to do it, so there’s no excuses.
  3. Start with guided meditation – Apps like (calm, headspace, waking up) are amazing to get you started.
  4. Have an intention and purpose of why you’re doing it – Commit yourself to it.

Now here we are, 3 years later, after my first 2 minute meditation session. And I haven’t looked back. Again, by no means am I perfect. I have my good days and my bad. But I’m human. And as humans we all make mistakes but, in my opinion, it is our duty to learn from them and make this world a better place. Internally and externally.

I am beyond grateful for meditation. It is hard at times, very hard, but this is a practice I am dedicated to continue, everyday, for the rest of my life.

The best part of it. It’s FREE.

Grateful,
Steve Ramos

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04.16.2020 /

Lessons in crisis

COVID-19 and Social Distancing could be the greatest thing to have happened to the human race, ever. As fucked up as it is, I believe everything is happening exactly as it should.

Think about it, when have you ever taken a full reset? Probably pretty rare. Now think of it not just individually, but as the whole world? I’m going to guess, NEVER.

This reset which forces us to stay home. We have two choices:

  1. To cope and feel like the world is fucked up and our lives are over. Stop working towards our dreams and use this time as an excuse to build bad behaviours.
  2. We can look at this as time for self reflection. A time for us to slow and be present with our family and loved ones. A time for us to facetime our family or friends we haven’t spoken to. A time for us to attend to the things we know we NEED to do, all the little things we’ve been putting off. A time for us to learn a new skill. A time for us to read books to grow our minds. A time for us to get more rest but also adapt and continue to move (even if slowly) towards our dreams.

Which one are you?

If you are the first option, that is okay. If you’ve been having a hard time and not doing much, that is okay. But how long will you let that continue? We can always choose to change the next moment. Choose to now adapt and take action.

During the second week of quarantine I was really down. I thought that we’d be back at work and I’d be making money (I’m a personal trainer) but when the social distancing kept getting extended I got really fearful and worried about how I would provide for our growing family. I let go and became lazy. Ate junk food. Stayed up late watching movies. And then I felt like shit. But I needed to go through it. Then I decided that I would not let the external factors determine my destiny. So I got back on track.

I really made it a point for myself to continue to work towards my dreams. I treat the day like I would a normal working day. I put in the work during the morning and day, then chill, be present and watch movies with Meaghen, in the evening. Having a healthy balance of both, especially during times like this has continued to give me purpose and meaning each day.

On the flip side, looking at old photos and videos with family and friends, truly makes me feel like I’ve taken SO MUCH for granted. The simple act of a handshake or hug, kissing our loved ones, going out to social events and travelling to beautiful places around the world. I took it ALL for granted.

And you know what? That is okay too. We are all humans who make mistakes. It’s situations like this crisis, that are catalysts for positive change in our lives.

Every morning, I get to have coffee with my fiance who is 4.5 months pregnant. We talk. We laugh. We plan on how we can make it through this. But most importantly, we are present with one another (no phones). I’ve spoken to my family and friends everyday. More than I have ever done. And for that, I am truly grateful.

Before the world was put on hold, ask yourself: Were you present with your loved ones? Or were you on your phone? Were you going about life with no purpose? Were you letting fear get in the way of your dreams?

Now that we must stay home. I hope we truly realize the importance of each moment we have together. How valuable our times is on this earth. Because we never know when that moment will be taken away. And we only have ONE LIFE. So will we continue to take those moments for granted? Or will we be grateful and present with one another, but also strive to be better and PUT IN THE WORK to achieve our dreams?

That is up to you my friend.

We are so blessed that we can still connect via social media, FaceTime etc. So call, text, facetime those that you’ve lost connection with. Tell them you love them, you’re grateful for them or just say hi. Adapt to the times and figure out how you can still grow, learn, make money and provide for your family during these times. Do what you can with what you have. For what you have is enough. And put in work. Remember your loved ones need you to show up.

SO, SHOW UP.

And remember, just like all seasons and just like the wind:

This too shall pass.

-Buddha

Love,
Steve Ramos

I am truly sorry to all those who have lost loved ones during this time. And to all the health care workers in the front line. Mad respect to you. Thank YOU. This is just my opinion and the perspective I’ve taken to help my get through this time.

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03.22.2020 /

Together

We are ALL in this together.

No matter how hard things may be, know that there is a lesson within all of this. Sometimes the lessons are disguised as really bad things. But on the other side, if we learn from it, is a stronger you. A better you.

Let’s do what we can now, to build a stronger body and mind.

How to find calm amidst the chaos:

  1. Meditate daily – create space amidst all the noise. 6 breathes can lower your blood pressure.
  2. Exercise – even just 20 minutes a day goes a loooong way.
  3. Go for a walk – spend time in nature, it’s beautiful.
  4. Connect with loved ones – Facetime if you have to. We all need to show love and support and make one another smile.
  5. Be grateful – that we get to wake up and live another day.
  6. Recover – get back to a solid sleep routine of min 7 hours of sleep.
  7. Help others – get out of your own head and help other people. Whatever that my look like and see how you feel after.
  8. Reflect and re-evaluate – On some unattended things you’ve been putting off. This is a sign to now go for what we want. What we know we NEED to do for ourselves.

LESSONS: What’s the good from all of this?

The universe/God is making us ALL slow down. And cleansing the world and our minds with less pollution. Because prior to this, would we have?

This is teaching us that life is too short. So we MUST make the most of each and every moment. In the end, that’s all we truly have.

We get to spend quality time with our loved ones. So be present. Be grateful for all that we have. Because we truly have so much.

We are ALL in this together. WE GOT THIS.

Love,
Steve Ramos

Grateful for you.

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02.27.2020 /

Happiness

Where do you find happiness?

For the longest time, I had been searching for happiness.

I thought that if I got to a certain job, made a certain amount of money and got a nice car I’d be happy. I thought that if I got my body to look a certain way, if I could get a certain girl and if I got respect from others, then I’d be happy.

I had been placing my happiness in someone or something else, expecting that it would give me the happiness I had always searched for. The funny thing is, once I got those things I wasn’t any happier. In fact, I felt even worse. 

I was truly fed up with my life. I was fed up with how I felt. I was fed up with my job. I wanted change so bad because I knew I was destined for more.

Most of all, I just wanted to be happy. I prayed to God everyday and asked him for help. Asked him to help me find happiness.

What I came to realize was that I had been searching for happiness in everything else, except myself. 

“(un)Fortunately, life puts us in a corner where we can’t run anymore and we have to look within.”

– Jay Shetty

I couldn’t run anymore. I had to face my own shit.

I had to learn to love myself, first. It was hard. Really hard. I had to learn to let go of the past that was holding me down. I had to learn to forgive myself of all my past mistakes. I had to learn to forgive all those I blamed and understand their side. Have empathy and compassion for them and know that they they tried their best.

We are all humans who make mistakes and sometimes the decisions we make, whether we are aware or not, can affect someone, positively or negatively, for the rest of their lives. To continue to put blame on them was childish. What happened, already happened. It’s done.

“I can’t change it.”

Is what I repeated to myself. So I stopped beating myself up and decided to change how I thought and I felt about it. 

We have the choice to relive an old painful moment over and over. This can give our mind and body the emotional response that it is still happening. The body doesn’t know any different. This can cause disease and chronic pain. 

Or we can actively choose to live in the present moment, where nothing is wrong. We can choose to focus on the positive in our lives, all that we are grateful for which can have the opposite effect. It can give us joy, peace and happiness. It can give us the space we need, to let it go.

Once I accepted the problem, forgave myself and others and decided to take ownership, my world changed. It felt lighter. It felt like I shed the weight of carrying the world on my shoulders. 

The crazy thing is, the whole time I was searching for happiness it was there the whole time. I just had to move past the clouds, walk through the storm. And at the end of it was sunshine.

Happiness is a choice, not a result. Nothing will make you happy until you choose to be happy. No person will make you happy unless you decide to be happy. Your happiness will not come to you. It can only come from you.

-Ralph Marston

Buddha said it best:
When the Student is Ready, the Teacher Will Appear

When you are ready to look inside and really dig deep, you’ll find the happiness you’ve always searched for. 

I believe in you.

Love,
Stephen Albert Ramos
#teamfitpak

Grateful for you.

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02.14.2020 /

Patience

Do you find that you’re the most patient with everyone else except your own partner?

To be brutally honest, I’m guilty of it. I seem to have the most patience, compassion and empathy with my clients, friends and even strangers but not as much with my own fiance or family.

Why is that? Not exactly sure.

But I do know one thing, it is something that we can change. But it has to be an active decision and intention that we set each moment, each day.

Valentine’s Day is a great reminder that we need to be the most patient, compassionate, empathetic, kind and loving to our partner and family. The one’s that will be there for us, for the rest of our lives. Not just today. But everyday.

How? Ask yourself:

“How can I be the best fiance, husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend that we can possibly be for them? What do they need from me? How can I help them? How can I understand and listen to them more?

Then BE IT. DO IT.

Try and go into each interaction with the intention that we are going to be the best partner we can possibly be for them. If we put aside any problems, resentment, frustrations aside and understand that they are human just like we are, then we can actively change the way that we treat them. We can start to build more patience, more compassion, more empathy, more love. Just like we had in the beginning of the relationship.

Let go of the expectations we have of them and treat them with the utmost respect and love. Give them the love, support and space to find their own way without having the need to force them into something we think they should do. You’re relationship can and will drastically change for the better.

Give it a try today. And tomorrow. And the next day. And so on.

Watch how that simple act of asking yourself those questions and setting the intention of who and how you’re going to be for them, can change the dynamic of our most important relationships.

It’s worth the try. Especially if you plan on spending the rest of your life with them.

Show them how grateful you are for them. Put away your phone. Slow down. Be present. Set the intention. And BE IT. And spend the quality time with them, that they deserve. Happy Valentine’s Day team.

Love,
Steve Ramos

I am grateful for you.

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02.13.2020 /

Forgive

Life becomes easier when you learn to accept the apology you never got – #robertbrault

Often times the apology we’re waiting for never comes.

And if it does, it’s never in the way we expect it to be. So we still carry resentment or hate towards that person.

Can you relate to this? I can.

When in reality, letting go of the expectation that we deserve an apology is the first step. Then forgiving within so that you can let it go.

Reminder: Forgiveness is not saying what the other person did is okay. It’s telling ourselves that it’s okay to let it go within.

That which you hold within; hate, resentment and anger is poison for your body and mind. No one else’s.

It’s not worth it.

Forgive. Let go.

Love,
Steve Ramos

Grateful for you.

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