02.05.2020 /

Live your dream, NOW

” Those times when you get up early and you work hard, those times when you stay up late and you work hard, those times when you don’t feel like working, you’re too tired and you don’t want to push yourself, but you do it anyway.

That is actually the dream.“

-Kobe Bryant
Retirement speech

My personal training client, Frank Veert is the embodiment of just that. When we met 4 years ago his dream was to be GM of a car dealership. 4 years later he is now partner of a dealership. Youngest in Canadian history. He’s been putting in work since he was a young teen, for years. He had a vision since he was young, he believed in himself and put in work, everyday. He is living proof that anything is possible. And he is living the dream, now. Beyond proud and grateful for him.

I’ve been watching Kobe’s retirement speech, and all of his other videos, over and over. Reminiscing and learning from the greatest of all time. The legacy he has left the world is forever cemented in history. His hard work, lessons and wisdom he has shared with the world makes me feel so sad for him and his family but also makes me extremely proud to have grown up in his era. Idolizing Kobe for the athlete he was but more so, for the man he became.

I wake up every morning. 5am. It’s pitch black outside. I meditate, journal, train. And I struggle, a lot. Everyday. But I keep doing it. However, lately I’ve caught myself complaining:

“What is this all for? Does anyone even care? I feel so alone.”

Listening to him talk about how he would wake up at 4 am, train, build the fundamentals, work on his weaknesses, and put in work while everyone was still sleeping, everyday, honestly made me feel so much better about my path and makes me feel not alone. Knowing that he did this for himself and look at the impact he has left around the world. It makes me want to work harder.

Instead of complaining about what I’m doing, I need to enjoy it. Enjoy the struggle. Know that it is part of the process of becoming who I always wished of becoming. And know that this is all for something, for someone out there, who can maybe be inspired by my discipline and relentless work. Just like Kobe has and will continue to, for millions out there.

By consistently putting in the work, over time, greatness will happen. Not by what we accomplish but just like Kobe said – Who we become in the process that is the dream. That is greatness.

We all wish we could be in a certain position, or make a certain amount of money and have this and that. But in the end it has nothing to do with that. It’s the path – the dirt road, the smooth road, the ups, the downs, the good, the bad, ALL OF IT –  that builds, makes and moulds who we are. Our character. Our spirit of who we always wished to be. The crazy thing is, that can be NOW. If actively decide and we honour the struggle. The times we wake up and don’t want to do it. But push through and do it anyway. If we continue to put in the work, everyday. We can live OUR DREAM, NOW.

Just like Kobe taught us. If you do the work and work hard enough. Dreams do come true.

So I am going to challenge myself, and challenge YOU – Honour the struggle. Truly enjoy it. Learn from every experience to be better. Work hard, everyday. Believe in yourself and know it is for something or someone out there, that need YOU.

” It’s not the destination it’s the journey… You won’t accomplish your dreams. Something greater will happen.“

-Kobe Bryant
RIP forever my friend

I am truly grateful for you. Your legacy lives on forever.

LIVE YOUR DREAM, NOW.

Love,
Stephen Albert Ramos

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01.14.2020 /

7 things I learned after my 5 day fast

I learned so much from this experience. More than I could’ve imagined:

1. Discipline and will power is the foundation of achieving anything I (we) want in life.
If one is motivated enough to do something, they will find a way to do it. No matter how hard the circumstances are. Just like the old saying goes,

“Where there’s a will, there’s a way”

2. My internal acceptance is not based on my external (physical) appearance.
I’ve been a prisoner to this for almost all my life. Growing up my family was not wealthy. But my parents did everything in their power to provide for us the best they could, even sacrificing their own needs.

In my teens, I had no money, no job, no car. I compared myself to my friends and others who had all of that. I didn’t think I was good enough, plain and simple (and still to this day). I was ashamed of my upbringing and felt I had something to prove. I wanted to feel like I belonged.

15 years ago, when I  came across physical training I found something that I absolutely loved. So I did it over and over and over – you get the point – and my body responded. 7 days a week, 3 hours a day (no joke) for years. Too much? Probably but I didn’t care. It was medicine for me. It was a form of therapy (another journal entry). I felt like I had an edge over others in this one area of my life because I started gaining respect from others. So from that point on, in my head, I had to work even harder. I had uphold such an image, no matter the cost.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret it one bit, but know I realize there’s so much more to training then the physical. Behind that is the mental which is the foundation of everything. Having the discipline to do the thing consistently, even when you don’t want to do it. That’s why this means so much to me. Not the fact that I didn’t eat for 5 days, but the discipline to tell myself that I’m going to do it, AND DO IT.

I literally thought I would shrink if I did not eat every 2-3 hours. Shovelling food down my throat. Never present while I was eating, just getting it in so that my muscles could grow. Sounds ridiculous I know. But that was my thought process behind it. But after not eating it was a huge mental hurdle for me to get over. I did lose weight, muscle mass and fat. I feel skinny but I think I’m okay with it. It’s letting go of my ego. I know that it will be a constant hurdle but with time I know it will get better as it already has.

3. I have a true appreciation for food as I used to take food for granted.
Visiting my hometown, the Philippines, with my family a few years ago was a complete culture shock. I saw two extremes – the wealthy and the poor. The poor had nothing. They lived in open shacks made of wood and mud. I saw two kids playing in knee high mud, splashing around, having the time of their life. The crazy thing, they were smiling. They seemed so happy. And here I am complaining about everything I don’t have. Why is it that we have so much but only focus on everything that’s missing. They would die to be in our shoes. Why can’t we see that?

There are people out there starving not knowing where their next meal is going to come from. It makes me sad just to think about it. But now having felt complete starvation, it  gives me a tiny bit of insight on how they feel, everyday.

4. I am even more cautious about what I will put in my body.
Don’t get me wrong, I still believe that we should still live life and enjoy the foods/drinks we want to, but within reason. There needs to be structure so that will allow you the freedom to indulge, a bit. “Structure gives you freedom.”

What we put (or not put) in our body affects how we function and feel, physically and mentally for days. Think about that in the long term and how that can determine the quality of our life. The one life we have.

Taking away everything and then bringing it back makes me realize the types of food that make me feel like shit or make me feel better. Again, It’s all about moderation and giving yourself the respect to not just inhale everything around you. Your body deserves better.

5. Practice self control over things I want vs things I actually need.
Not to say that we don’t need food because we do. But more in a sense of wanting vs needing – applicable to (junk) food and pretty much everything else in life. Always wanting more of this, more of that, but when does it end? Stop and ask yourself, “Do I actually NEED this?” “Will this make my life better or worse?” If not, don’t eat (drink) it. Don’t buy it. Simple as that. You’ll most likely feel better and It’ll save you the money in the long run. Live with less and have a more simple fulfilled life.

6. I can’t let myself (others) down.
As Don Miguel Ruiz states in his book – The Four Agreements:
Be impeccable with your word.

Do what you say. Say what you do. Because our word is sacred. This applies to all that you do in your life. Keep your word and be reliable to yourself and others.

7. We all need a break.
Taking this break has given me a full reset. Just like you would turn off or reset your computer, I feel I have done that with my body and mind. Giving my gut a break: from eating, drinking coffee, supplements and alcohol. Also a break from smoking weed and giving my muscles a break from intense training (still did light workouts 2/5 days) was exactly what my body and mind needed.

It forced me to slow down. Literally, if I didn’t I felt light-headed. Otherwise, I don’t think I would’ve especially from physical training. I came back revitalized. My workouts now feel stronger and I feel re-motivated with my work and life in general. It was exactly what my mind needed.

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Not to mention all the other benefits associated to fasting (in previous journal entry) Well worth the 5 days. And I’ll gladly do it all over again, every year for the rest of my life. Remember, longevity is the name of the game. So we can do the things we love, with those that we love, for the rest of our lives. Because if we can’t, what’s the point?

Thanks for reading. Come back, anytime. Grateful for you.

With love,
Steve Ramos

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01.13.2020 /

Here’s my sleep routine to get BETTER sleep ?

I used to have HORRIBLE sleep. I was tired ALL DAY. Felt sluggish, hella cranky/moody etc. I was getting 4-5 hours on average. And wondered why I was irritable, snappy, depressed and extremely negative.

How you start your day is just as important as how you end your day. Have a solid routine for both. Think of it as a ritual that you must do everyday. If the longevity and quality of your life is important to you, than you will sacrifice some stuff you want to do in order to get better sleep.

Listen, if I could I’d stay up all night watching movies you better believe I would. But I got shit to do, clients to train and that is my living, so I need as much energy and focus so they can get the best of me with my undivided attention.

How did I change that? It took some time, but here is my routine that has changed the way I sleep. Now, I wake up feeling rested, better than before and have more energy through the day:

Each night I do my best to accomplish 80% of this list:

1. Meditation – am or pm. Focus on breathe.
Helps clear the mind from all the noise and stress in our life. When the mind is clear it can relax and rest.

2. Eating curfew
No eating at least one hour before bed. Stay away from heavy carbs, refined sugar and spicy foods.

3. No alcohol
Which raises your heart rate and will affect the quality of your sleep. Often times quality is more important than quantity but both would be ideal for a good night’s rest.

4. Limit caffeine intake
Limit to one cup a day. No later than 12-4pm depending on how sensitive you are to caffeine. Yes I know, extremely hard. What helped me was my fast which gave me a break from coffee which reset my baseline. Now a small cup of coffee in the am is all I need. Coffee detox?

5. Screen curfew – 1 hour before
No blue lights 1 hour before. Yes phone AND Netflix. The blue light resets your circadian rhythm and your body actually thinks it’s daytime.

6. Take magnesium – 1 hour before
Improves sleep quality. Helps body and mind relax.

7. Read (fiction, story based)
Helps body get into relaxation mode. I find when I read stories my mind slows down and it’s a trigger for me that bedtime is near.

8. Foam roll (focus on breathe)
Just like a massage. Full relaxation and recovery of the muscles. The body goes into parasympathetic response which = rest.

9. Dark and cold room
The body sleeps best when the room is dark and the temperature is turned down. So get some black out curtains if you have to. Turn over your phone or place in a different room and get to sleepin’.

Also (which I can write about in another journal entry.) Herbal teas, CBD, are other things to name a few to help you fall asleep. I decided to write things that you can do right now that don’t require anything but yourself and some self discipline.

Plan to get ready for bed, aim for the same time, so that you are getting minimum 7 hours of sleep. Most importantly, you have to believe that will get good sleep. Going to bed thinking your going to have shitty sleep means you will have shitty sleep. Have a positive outlook towards it, take the necessary steps to change and you will, with time, get better sleep.

Getting into a routine where you go to bed and wake up around the same time is huge. Obviously can’t always be the case but try your best to adhere to it.

WHY?

You can Accomplish so much more when you sleep more. More sleep = longevitiy and quality of life. It also allows you to access your full potential. When you’re sleepy your more hungry and you can make very poor nutrition decisions. It affects mood, metabolism, anxiety, depression , weight loss, just to name a few.

I had one client whose starting weight was 355 lbs. After a few months and lots of hard work with exercises and nutrition we dropped just shy of 300 lbs. But no matter what we couldn’t break the 300 mark. He worked 3 jobs and got 4 hours of sleep. For the entire time we were training him I begged him to get more sleep. He said he didn’t need it. I asked him for just 5 days of 7 hours of sleep. We shook on it.

And guess what? After the 5 days of sleep he broke the 300 lbs plateau! We made it to 295 lbs. How? When the body doesn’t get enough sleep it doesn’t release a chemical called leptin which helps regulate the control of hunger and metabolism. The decrease in leptin brought on by sleep deprivation can result in a constant feeling of hunger and can slow down your metabolism.

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Yes, this seems like a lot, but if sleep is important to you then you will do, at least some of this, in order to change your situation. Once you get into a routine it becomes second nature and it becomes easy. It requires a bit of work in the beginning to instill the habit but once you do you’re golden. I know you can do it. If you’re always tired and complain about it. But make absolutely no change, then how do you expect things to change? That’s on you.

“Doing the same thing and expecting a different result is insanity.”

Complain LESS, take action NOW and watch your life change.

Much love,
Steve Ramos

Grateful for you.

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01.06.2020 /

5 day fast. Here’s what I found.

DISCLAIMER* This is NOT medical advice. Do not do without consulting your doctor or support from others who are experienced in this manner.

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I started the year with a bang. A 5 day fast. Yes, you got that right.
No food. Just water.

Water – with a pinch of himalayan sea salt and (unflavoured San Pellegrino. Along with herbal tea – rooibos, peppermint and chamomile.

Side note: I have been practicing intermittent fasting for a while now and have done 1 day fasts in the past.

Why the F would you do that? Let me explain.
Mental resiliency! I wanted a full reset of my body and mind. I didn’t want to be ruled by my hunger anymore. If I didn’t eat every 2-3 hours I would legit get ‘hangry’. I also wanted to mentally test my discipline and will power by doing something so extreme. It goes against everything that I (we) were taught growing up. You have to eat every day, minimum 3 meals a day, 365 days a year. But do we? Think of primitive times where they had to hunt for their food and would fast until their next meal, assuming that they made the kill.

Also, I’ve been recommended by a handful of friends who have done and continue to do 5 day fasts multiple times a year.

Benefits:
1. Prevent cancer – My mom had breast cancer and beat it with a mastectomy. My father passed away from stage 4 kidney cancer that spread to both lungs.
2. Longevity of life – Some of the people that have lived the longest have had some form of fasting protocol throughout their life.
3. Improve heart health, blood pressure, cholesterol levels – reduce risk of heart disease.
4. Boost brain function – Mental alertness and clarity.
5. Boost Metabolism – Amazing reset to metabolism for me.
6. Increase Growth Hormone – Increased muscle strength.
7. Reduce Inflammation – I train a lot so this is great for muscle and joint inflammation. Also foods I eat – healthy and unhealthy – could have caused inflammation within my body.

Day 1
I started the fast midnight of NYE which was a bad idea. Since the next day we had a family get together with ALL the food. My mother thought I was mad at her because I didn’t eat. I sat on the couch while my family and friends ate dinner at the dinner table. It was brutal. Hearing them eat and talk about how good the food was killed me. The first day was a huge test. But I passed it!

Day 2
Woke up feeling insanely hungry. I stood up from bed and immediately felt like I was going to fall over. I woke up from a dream of waterfalls. Makes sense since I’ve been chugging water up until this point. Had water with a bit of himalayan sea salt and peppermint tea.

My first client was at 6:30 am. As soon as I did some movement and mobility with him I felt amazing. I did a light training session. And felt pretty good. I wanted to do more but realized I needed to take it easy. I had a full day of clients and surprisingly felt amazing. I felt super focused and dialed in. Very energetic and felt the mental clarity that I was informed I would feel. Just didn’t expect to feel it this fast.

Had a crazy leg day. I pushed the limit on what I could do. I went lighted on the weights but had high volume. I told myself I was going to take it easy during the fast but I felt really good and pushed the envelope. Towards the end I felt a bit nauseous.

Had a podcast that night with the Brain Jiu Jitsu fellas – Ryan Caligiuri, Arlin Grey, Shawn Henry, Enrico De Thomasis, James Nakonechny – who are all experienced fast(ers). They all do it 2-4 times a year. I felt I was in good hands. As the podcast went on I felt fine as I was distracted with amazing conversation, also got golden advice and motivation to keep on going.

In the evening I had some chamomile tea and foam rolled. Felt AMAZING going to bed. Minus my heart pounding out of my chest. I noticed that my heart rate increased dramatically on day 1.

Day 3
I woke up with a surprise. I was thinking that I would feel better as my body would be getting into ketosis – body uses fat as fuel – but I woke up feeling extremely drained. I almost fell over as I got out of bed to go to the washroom. I had to snooze after (which I rarely do).

Training my clients felt okay as I did the movement and mobility with them. Did not feel hungry as I was focused on being present with them.

However as I got home, the smell of a candle set me off. I immediately got extremely hungry. Had some chamomile tea and thought I would feel better but my stomach was very uneasy. Felt like I could have thrown up or passed out.

When I went to bed I was having a hard time sleeping as my heart beat literally felt like it was going to pop out of my chest.

Day 4
This was the worst day of how I felt. I was very thrown off as I thought for sure my body would be in ketosis and I would feel the best the last 2 days. However that was not the case. I felt very sick: Stomach hurt, nauseous, very light headed, my body felt drained.

I had a class at the Community Gym that morning at 9am. I honestly questioned how I would get through it as it requires a lot of mental and physical energy to train and motivate 20 people. But as I did the warmup and went through the session I felt immediately better. As I was coaching I was a bit out of breathe but still pulled through.

Took it easy the rest of the day. Felt okay.

Day 5
Woke up knowing I had only one day left was a huge relief. I felt the same as day 4 but not as bad. Sluggish, very slow, lightheaded and stomach a still a bit uneasy.

Today was my last test as my family went to a Pizzeria. I sat there while they enjoyed amazing pizza. Again I felt I had come this far which I had more pride from.

I broke my fast with bone broth soup made by my #1 supporter, my fiance, Meaghen. It was worth the wait! She truly understood why I was doing it and helped me a ton. I am beyond grateful for her through this journey (and everyday). I love you babe.

How did I feel?
Not gonna lie. It was way harder than I thought. It was super challenging. My sense of smell was insane. The slightest smell would set off urges to eat everything insight. Even the smell of a vanilla candle set me off.

I lost weight (did not weigh myself) But could feel it and see it in the mirror. My clothes felt baggier. I don’t think I lost too much weight and nothing that I know I can’t get back to.

Also, It really messed with me mentally, in a sense that I felt I had to uphold a certain image (size) to feel accepted. As I have for the last 15 years of my physical training career. But that is definitely not the case. I am not valued by my body. I am valued and accepted by the way I accept myself and how I treat and add value to others.

I feel extremely proud of myself knowing that I had done something most people haven’t or won’t in their lifetime.

Lessons
Next time, I will not tell anyone  that I am doing a fast, other than those that have fasted and/or who support me 100% and understand why I’m doing a fast. It is so foreign to people that they don’t understand it. I found myself constantly having to justify myself to other people why I was doing it. Almost felt like people were offended that I was fasting (or maybe just in my head). So for next time (or anytime) I will fast in silence and only tell them once I’m done. Talk less, just DO.

Should you do it?
I’m not going to tell you to do it. But if you do your research and feel that this will benefit you, all you! First, consult with a Dr and have proper support and guidance through the process, then it is up to you to see how it can help you. Do at your own risk.

Verdict
I loved it. For the simple fact that it was hard as F. I’ve decided that I will do a 5 day fast, a minimum of once per year and supplement it with 1-3 day fasts twice per year. I find there is a true benefit for the body and the mind. I love testing my discipline and this is one way to do it.

I also realized that I took food for granted. To have food readily available to us at the click of a finger. I was rarely present when I ate. Just always tried to shovel it down my mouth like I haven’t eaten for weeks (almost every meal). But instead actually smell the food, chew it, savour it and thank god for granting me a beautiful life to eat anything I want, whenever I want.

My friend Aman Sidhu brought this to ligth as he finished his 5 day fast –

“Think about the billions of people out there starving. Not knowing when their next meal will be. We have food so readily available to us. We are SO BLESSED.”

It was hard as F. But I did it! I want to be able to incorporate this into my yearly routine as I know the benefits will help me long term. I want to live a long healthy life to be able to support my future family to the best of my ability both mentally and physically. I will continue to try other life “hacks” to continue to push the envelope of what I think (know) my body and mind can do.

As my friend and experienced guide, Arlin Gray, through this process told me:

Brother. You did it. ??
You just did something that >95% of people can’t do. Most wouldn’t even try it because it’s so far beyond their capabilities. Your brain just denied your body the second most important thing in this world for it’s survival because your brain knows the benefits and has that much fucking power to take the wheel when it matters. I’m GLAD it was harder than you thought. And you still did it. That’s discipline.Now tell me, if you can do that, what can’t you do?
Love,
Steve Ramos
Grateful for you.

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01.03.2020 /

How to achieve your goals in 2020

First off, the foundation behind all of this, is your WHY.

Your purpose, your mission in life. Your big-picture goal. Or guiding northstar. The thing that will keep you going even when you don’t want to.

“If you don’t understand your why, then goals become easy to discard” – Aubrey Marcus

For me, my mission in life is to live and share my store to empower others to be better versions of themselves mentally and physically. It took me a while to figure it out but with the help of some friends and the “Go For Your Win” Course by Aubrey Marcus, I was able to nail down and refine my Why. Not to say it’ll change but it’s a great start to get me on my way.

It helps if your mission / purpose is bigger than you. To me, that means I have no option not to do it. God/Universe has blessed me with a unique gift that I must dig deep to find and share that with the world. Most importantly, I can’t let my clients, friends, and supporters down. It is my duty to uphold each and every day to put in the work that is necessary to achieve my goals so that I can help as many people as I possibly can. That’s what helps me do the thing, when I don’t want to do the thing. It is my northstar.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not perfect and definitely not always 100% productive. I’m human, just like we all are. We are not perfect. But what we can do is strive for excellence to help us learn, get better and refine our approach at whatever it is we’re trying to do.

So before anything, do what you can to figure out what your WHY is. It doesn’t have to be perfect but it can be a start.

1. Find your WHY

The next step is to ask yourself the right questions:

2. What did I learn in 2019 about myself? Good and bad
3. What can I have done better?
4. What goal(s) do I want to achieve?
5. What habits and discipline will I implement in 2020 to help me grow towards my goal? (Can be broken into different categories: professional, personal, finance, relationships, health, spiritual)
6. Make a plan of action with a narrowed focus.
7. Take action. EVERYDAY.

Self introspection / self reflection is a must if you want to make change in your life and to achieve your goals.

Most importantly, have unwavering faith in yourself. Surround yourself with people that support and elevate you to a higher level. Cut out the rest. AND PUT IN THE F*CKING WORK.

You got this. I believe in you.

Much love,
Steve Ramos
TEAMFITPAK

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12.12.2019 /

Grateful: Where it all began

After my dad passed I was completely broken. I stopped training, meditating and journaling. Pretty much anything that helped me mentally and physically, I stopped doing. I did nothing except sleep. I was completely depressed.

I think I was more angry at myself for how bad I treated my father. And the fact that I knew I had no chance to make it up to him. No chance to have the relationship I always wish I had. That’s what haunted me, sometimes still to this day.

My girlfriend, Meaghen, finally convinced me to get back into the gym and workout. She knew how much training did for me. It was my medicine.

At the time, I was a personal trainer at a big box gym. I was too scared to workout there because I was too ashamed to see or speak with anyone, like co-workers and my own clients. I was known as the positive guy at the gym. However, I was the complete opposite. I was negative, angry, depressed, sad, and completely lost.

I remember driving one day, about 2 months later, and I just started crying. I started thinking about memories of our family. One memory in specific – our family trips to LA. My dad would drive pretty much 3 full days to get us there. We would pack up the beat up caravan and drive for 3 days to LA to spend the summer there. I loved it because we were all together and it was when I was happiest.

I knew I needed to get the fuck out of the city. I remembered I had a credit for a mobility certification. The day I found out that dad had cancer I was in Toronto for that certification. I left early when my brother, Scott called me crying and told me. It felt like a gunshot went off right beside my ears. The ringing was so loud. I couldn’t believe it. So I left.

I emailed them and informed them of the situation. They emailed me back with a credit. I looked to see when and where the next class was and guess where it was! LA baby. Santa Monica, California. It felt to me like it was a sign.

I immediately called my Meaghen and she told me I needed to go. It was truly a healing place for me. I loved staring out the window feeling so happy. Breathing in the air, staring into the ocean and palm trees meant so much to me. It reminded me of my dad.

So I packed up and went to LA to take the course. I told myself I would make the most of every waking moment. I woke up at 5 am and would drive to the beach most mornings. I would stay there ALL DAY. It was therapy for me. I cried, meditated, journaled, read and trained on the beach. I could honestly feel my dad there with me.

One morning, meditating on my uncles porch. I broke down half way through and couldn’t stop crying. I stood up and walked into the middle of the street. I looked up and stared at a palm tree. I asked my dad for help and for forgiveness. At that moment instead of thinking about all the bad, I started thinking about all that I was grateful for. I snapped a pic of that palm tree and hand wrote grateful and posted it on IG.

Moments later I had so many messages asking me who wrote that. My brother called me and said I needed to make that something. At that moment I knew that the direction of FITPAK would become my mission to share my story and positive messaging to help others out there going through the same thing.

The daily act of gratitude that I practiced, every morning and night, SAVED MY LIFE. It rewired my brain to look for the positive in every situation. It helped me to not focus on not the fact that my father was gone, but that I shared all of the beautiful memories and experiences with him. Those memories would be with me, forever.

And that’s where it all began. How grateful was born. Now our forever mantra.

I am grateful for you dad. Thank you for all the love and courage you had for our family.

I love you. I miss you. Rest in paradise.

Grateful,
Stephen Albert Ramos

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11.27.2019 /

I’m going to get married

So this weekend I proposed! (finally), to my beautiful girlfriend, Meaghen, of 5 years. I was a loss for words, literally.

My sister, Sharon, took out Meaghen to distract her while my friend and photographer helped me set up at our crib. We were thinking of where he could hide. We tried the shower, but would be too difficult to pop out of there and capture our special moment. We decided the pantry would be the most efficient spot. He hid in the pantry and practiced sliding out and snapping the pic. He nailed it!

I wasn’t nervous until about an hour before. I was sweating! Had to take off my shirt while Skye was helping me on what to say. I started having an anxiety attack LOL

When Meaghen walked in she saw the rose petals on the ground, looked at me and said “What’s happening here?”

The plan was that I was going to throw her off by saying “Babe I fucked up” then get on my knee and speak from the heart.

What actually happened: I kept saying “I fucked up. I fucked up.” And repeated that over and over. And over. No other words came out LOL I got on my knee, opened the box and looked at her. I don’t even remember asking her. She said yes and that was it!

I keep replaying that in my head and beat myself up for not saying what I wanted to say but it happened exactly as it should. And for that I’m grateful!

It’s crazy to think that we met each other in high school 19 years ago. We connected 5 years ago and history was made. I always had a crush on her, never thinking I had a chance. And here we are today, engaged. So truly blessed and grateful!

That goes to show you that you really never know how things will end up, where you will be in your life and the people surrounding you. Just got to put in work for yourself, heal within, be kind, help others, believe in yourself and have FAITH. Things never seem to end up the way you expect them to be, but things just seem to work out in the way they are supposed to.

I realize now that the closest people to you shape who you become. So I’ve made it a point to ONLY surround myself with those who make me better. Meaghen being one of them.

My journey to self discovery, self help and really just trying to find happiness began 2-3 years into our relationship. She was there from the beginning. I was in a dark place mentally before we met. But she saw the real me, the kind happy person, behind all the pain.

And for that I’m forever grateful. She makes me a better person. Her kind heart, her caring nature and her beautiful soul (to just name a few) is why I want to spend the rest of my life with her.

I love you.
Steve Ramos

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11.20.2019 /

3 things I’m grateful for on my 35th birthday

1. I am grateful for myself, Steve Ramos
2. I am grateful for the opportunity to make a positive impact on this earth for as many people as I can.
3. I am grateful to be alive.

My intention for this year is to be more present with my family, friends, and pretty much anyone I come in contact with. As human beings, all we truly want is to be loved, feel connected and to just be heard. So to lend an open ear without the need to tell them what you think they should do (def need to work on), is one of the greatest gifts we can give one another.

After my father passed almost 3 years ago, I truly realized that a happy, “successful” life is not measured by money or things. It is measured by the experiences we have, the lessons we learn and the love we share with one another.

Most importantly, how present we are in each of those moments. In the end, that’s all we truly have: A collection of moments. So we MUST make the most of every single moment. You never know when that will be gone.

I used to be afraid of getting old, losing my hair, etc. But to be honest, life is only getting better. I am becoming wealthier! Not in a monetary sense but wealthier with connections, friendships, knowledge, wisdom and love.

As someone who is indecisive, as I’m sure a lot of you are, I realize that things don’t have to be perfect. There is never a right time. We just have to DO.

Let’s make a promise with ourselves:

DO whatever it is you know you NEED to do for yourself. We have ONE LIFE. What are you going to do with it? What is the impact you want to make? How will you make this world a better place? What is the legacy you want to leave?

Decide and DO IT. Plan (don’t overthink it), take action and do it EVERYDAY. Life is too short to wait.

I am grateful to be alive. You should be too. Make the most of it.

I love you and I believe in you.

Much love,
Stephen Albert Ramos