Tag: aubreymarcus

04.16.2020 /

Lessons in crisis

COVID-19 and Social Distancing could be the greatest thing to have happened to the human race, ever. As fucked up as it is, I believe everything is happening exactly as it should.

Think about it, when have you ever taken a full reset? Probably pretty rare. Now think of it not just individually, but as the whole world? I’m going to guess, NEVER.

This reset which forces us to stay home. We have two choices:

  1. To cope and feel like the world is fucked up and our lives are over. Stop working towards our dreams and use this time as an excuse to build bad behaviours.
  2. We can look at this as time for self reflection. A time for us to slow and be present with our family and loved ones. A time for us to facetime our family or friends we haven’t spoken to. A time for us to attend to the things we know we NEED to do, all the little things we’ve been putting off. A time for us to learn a new skill. A time for us to read books to grow our minds. A time for us to get more rest but also adapt and continue to move (even if slowly) towards our dreams.

Which one are you?

If you are the first option, that is okay. If you’ve been having a hard time and not doing much, that is okay. But how long will you let that continue? We can always choose to change the next moment. Choose to now adapt and take action.

During the second week of quarantine I was really down. I thought that we’d be back at work and I’d be making money (I’m a personal trainer) but when the social distancing kept getting extended I got really fearful and worried about how I would provide for our growing family. I let go and became lazy. Ate junk food. Stayed up late watching movies. And then I felt like shit. But I needed to go through it. Then I decided that I would not let the external factors determine my destiny. So I got back on track.

I really made it a point for myself to continue to work towards my dreams. I treat the day like I would a normal working day. I put in the work during the morning and day, then chill, be present and watch movies with Meaghen, in the evening. Having a healthy balance of both, especially during times like this has continued to give me purpose and meaning each day.

On the flip side, looking at old photos and videos with family and friends, truly makes me feel like I’ve taken SO MUCH for granted. The simple act of a handshake or hug, kissing our loved ones, going out to social events and travelling to beautiful places around the world. I took it ALL for granted.

And you know what? That is okay too. We are all humans who make mistakes. It’s situations like this crisis, that are catalysts for positive change in our lives.

Every morning, I get to have coffee with my fiance who is 4.5 months pregnant. We talk. We laugh. We plan on how we can make it through this. But most importantly, we are present with one another (no phones). I’ve spoken to my family and friends everyday. More than I have ever done. And for that, I am truly grateful.

Before the world was put on hold, ask yourself: Were you present with your loved ones? Or were you on your phone? Were you going about life with no purpose? Were you letting fear get in the way of your dreams?

Now that we must stay home. I hope we truly realize the importance of each moment we have together. How valuable our times is on this earth. Because we never know when that moment will be taken away. And we only have ONE LIFE. So will we continue to take those moments for granted? Or will we be grateful and present with one another, but also strive to be better and PUT IN THE WORK to achieve our dreams?

That is up to you my friend.

We are so blessed that we can still connect via social media, FaceTime etc. So call, text, facetime those that you’ve lost connection with. Tell them you love them, you’re grateful for them or just say hi. Adapt to the times and figure out how you can still grow, learn, make money and provide for your family during these times. Do what you can with what you have. For what you have is enough. And put in work. Remember your loved ones need you to show up.

SO, SHOW UP.

And remember, just like all seasons and just like the wind:

This too shall pass.

-Buddha

Love,
Steve Ramos

I am truly sorry to all those who have lost loved ones during this time. And to all the health care workers in the front line. Mad respect to you. Thank YOU. This is just my opinion and the perspective I’ve taken to help my get through this time.

02.27.2020 /

Happiness

Where do you find happiness?

For the longest time, I had been searching for happiness.

I thought that if I got to a certain job, made a certain amount of money and got a nice car I’d be happy. I thought that if I got my body to look a certain way, if I could get a certain girl and if I got respect from others, then I’d be happy.

I had been placing my happiness in someone or something else, expecting that it would give me the happiness I had always searched for. The funny thing is, once I got those things I wasn’t any happier. In fact, I felt even worse. 

I was truly fed up with my life. I was fed up with how I felt. I was fed up with my job. I wanted change so bad because I knew I was destined for more.

Most of all, I just wanted to be happy. I prayed to God everyday and asked him for help. Asked him to help me find happiness.

What I came to realize was that I had been searching for happiness in everything else, except myself. 

“(un)Fortunately, life puts us in a corner where we can’t run anymore and we have to look within.”

– Jay Shetty

I couldn’t run anymore. I had to face my own shit.

I had to learn to love myself, first. It was hard. Really hard. I had to learn to let go of the past that was holding me down. I had to learn to forgive myself of all my past mistakes. I had to learn to forgive all those I blamed and understand their side. Have empathy and compassion for them and know that they they tried their best.

We are all humans who make mistakes and sometimes the decisions we make, whether we are aware or not, can affect someone, positively or negatively, for the rest of their lives. To continue to put blame on them was childish. What happened, already happened. It’s done.

“I can’t change it.”

Is what I repeated to myself. So I stopped beating myself up and decided to change how I thought and I felt about it. 

We have the choice to relive an old painful moment over and over. This can give our mind and body the emotional response that it is still happening. The body doesn’t know any different. This can cause disease and chronic pain. 

Or we can actively choose to live in the present moment, where nothing is wrong. We can choose to focus on the positive in our lives, all that we are grateful for which can have the opposite effect. It can give us joy, peace and happiness. It can give us the space we need, to let it go.

Once I accepted the problem, forgave myself and others and decided to take ownership, my world changed. It felt lighter. It felt like I shed the weight of carrying the world on my shoulders. 

The crazy thing is, the whole time I was searching for happiness it was there the whole time. I just had to move past the clouds, walk through the storm. And at the end of it was sunshine.

Happiness is a choice, not a result. Nothing will make you happy until you choose to be happy. No person will make you happy unless you decide to be happy. Your happiness will not come to you. It can only come from you.

Buddha said it best:
When the Student is Ready, the Teacher Will Appear

When you are ready to look inside and really dig deep, you’ll find the happiness you’ve always searched for. 

I believe in you.

Love,
Stephen Albert Ramos
#teamfitpak

Grateful for you.

01.03.2020 /

How to achieve your goals in 2020

First off, the foundation behind all of this, is your WHY.

Your purpose, your mission in life. Your big-picture goal. Or guiding northstar. The thing that will keep you going even when you don’t want to.

“If you don’t understand your why, then goals become easy to discard” – Aubrey Marcus

For me, my mission in life is to live and share my store to empower others to be better versions of themselves mentally and physically. It took me a while to figure it out but with the help of some friends and the “Go For Your Win” Course by Aubrey Marcus, I was able to nail down and refine my Why. Not to say it’ll change but it’s a great start to get me on my way.

It helps if your mission / purpose is bigger than you. To me, that means I have no option not to do it. God/Universe has blessed me with a unique gift that I must dig deep to find and share that with the world. Most importantly, I can’t let my clients, friends, and supporters down. It is my duty to uphold each and every day to put in the work that is necessary to achieve my goals so that I can help as many people as I possibly can. That’s what helps me do the thing, when I don’t want to do the thing. It is my northstar.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not perfect and definitely not always 100% productive. I’m human, just like we all are. We are not perfect. But what we can do is strive for excellence to help us learn, get better and refine our approach at whatever it is we’re trying to do.

So before anything, do what you can to figure out what your WHY is. It doesn’t have to be perfect but it can be a start.

1. Find your WHY

The next step is to ask yourself the right questions:

2. What did I learn in 2019 about myself? Good and bad
3. What can I have done better?
4. What goal(s) do I want to achieve?
5. What habits and discipline will I implement in 2020 to help me grow towards my goal? (Can be broken into different categories: professional, personal, finance, relationships, health, spiritual)
6. Make a plan of action with a narrowed focus.
7. Take action. EVERYDAY.

Self introspection / self reflection is a must if you want to make change in your life and to achieve your goals.

Most importantly, have unwavering faith in yourself. Surround yourself with people that support and elevate you to a higher level. Cut out the rest. AND PUT IN THE F*CKING WORK.

You got this. I believe in you.

Much love,
Steve Ramos
TEAMFITPAK